Screwed.edu
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
