My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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