Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
