He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
me + whiskey = a bad person
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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