What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
