I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
