All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
