The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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