i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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