i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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