This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
