I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
