So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
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