We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
