she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
