found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
