There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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