Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
