I could have mohawked her pubes.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
