With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
