There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Randomize
