you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
