Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize