i just had sex bonerless
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
