We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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