i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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