It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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