My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
