he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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