Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
