It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Randomize
