I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
