I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
