I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
