New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Mom said you looked used
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
