carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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