So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
My liver just had a heart attack.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
