He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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