and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
