I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
