addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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