Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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