I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
