I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Less talking, more tequila
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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