The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Found the puke drawer
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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