This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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