Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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