Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
