I just cut my nipple shaving
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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