I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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